Po`ipu in Hawaiian means “to overwhelm” or “to attack”, and what turned out to be a single murder in Waikiki ends up being a full assault on the Five-0 team. The episode begins with a sexy Lady in Red (Emmanuelle Vaugier) who makes hooking up in Waikiki look like an hourly occurrence with the clueless Secret Agent Man. Seriously Secret Agent Man, *nothing* comes that easy. And boy does he learn that the hard way and ends up in a bloody mess.
The investigation commences, Kono plies through the crime scene under the watchful eye of Chin Ho. “Maika`i loa, Rookie”, [very good!] Chin tells Kono. No, Chin Ho, maika`i loa to you for pulling off the Hawaiian, brah! Meanwhile, Danno and McG speed off to pick up the deposed dictator, while arguing the merits of Hawaii versus Jersey. Danno insists that Jersey’s greatest contribution to American culture is Jon Bon Jovi…that whole dialog cracked me up!
The dynamic duo fly down to the state capitol to see protesters demonstrating against the imminent arrival of the deposed leader, Kim Jong Il (Ric Young). Sparks fly and old emotions flare when McG runs into his former partner Bullfrog (Max Martini). Their bromance threatened, Danno stands there, green with envy…
The investigation brings them to their first suspect, a former soldier of the deposed leader named Shan (Nelson Lee) . After taking him down (“DUDE! You got tackled by a girl! hah!”), he confesses that he doesn’t want Kim Jong Il dead, but rather he wants to tie up the court system for years and cost the tax payers millions by having Kim Jong stand trial. His mother passionately tell our heroes about the one time, she ordered seafood fried rice, and he accidentally gave them pork fried rice, AND HE REFUSED TO REFUND HER. That man is pure evil I tell you.
Chin Ho manages to track the Lady In Red by cross checking maxim.com and googling keywords “hot assassins”, and they find her at the Aloha Tower Marketplace. Just when McG thinks he’s got the jump on her, she takes off with guns blazing! McG’s first motto is “Leave no man behind” (107, Ho`apono), his second motto is “Don’t let tourists get in the way of your bullets” and fires back multiple times. His work is cut short thankfully when the Lady in Red fails to look both ways before crossing the street (splat!).
With that lead dead, they go back to pick up Kim Jong Il. On the way to the summit, they find out that Bullfrog is in on the assassination plot! A battle ensues, guns blaze and more brand new Chevys are destroyed. They make off to McG’s house’s for sanctuary where Kim Jong Il finally reveals that he’s had a change of heart and wants to atone for his crimes. In a firery exchange McG lectures Kim Jong Il about how his team and Kim’s family could have been killed, but Kim Jong shoots back that if he lives, his survival means his whole country is saved. Could it be?!? McG got it wrong?!?!
Bullfrog tracks McG to the house on McG’s hacked iphone (Steve Jobs would insist that McG was holding the phone the wrong way). McG goes into Black Ops mode and takes out the attackers commando style. The team protects the family, and McG takes down Bullfrog, and all is well again in the Aloha State.
This was a very, very, good episode. The writers sacrificed character development (hm..what *is* McG’s specialty?) in exchange for a strong story about redemption/second chances and big action. In all seriousness, the story is a thinly veiled reference to Burma’s recent political troubles. There is a small Burmese population here in Hawaii who would take the story a lot more to heart than the rest of us.
And now, “Things We Learned About Hawaii From Hawaii 5-0″ Episode 9, Po`ipu:
3) We have more Chevrolet dealerships than Starbucks stores and ABC stores combined. Everyone here drives a Chevrolet. Chevrolets are the only car in existence. If you can’t afford a new Camaro, there’s an abundance of 1988 Chevy Celebrities around.
2) The state of Hawaii suffered through 17 days of furloughs for the kids, department budgets were cut, and people were laid off, but the Hawaii Five-0 team can afford high end (Chevrolet) cars and the most high tech computer equipment where with a few waves of your hand you can throw PDF files up on multiple 50 inch plasma monitors.
1) Dudes…if you’re a single guy hanging out in Waikiki and a hot chick throws herself at you, she doesn’t want you. She wants you dead. Maybe you’re a secret agent she needs dead, maybe she hates her exboyfriend and she’s taking it out on you, maybe she hates men the way Rosie O’Donnell hates men, but there’s no happy ending to that secret rendez-vous.
ET and SY contributed to this.